Love & Insecurities

I love him, I trust him, but because of the insecurities within myself I sometimes think he's too busy for me, or he doesn't really feel like talking. And I get if he's down and he's wthdrawn, that's something else. I just get weird. Last two days I've been down, and I've messaged him normally- I don't feel right just outing "I feel down and don't feel the safest right now, I don't trust myself." I'm not like that. I know if I really was going to harm myself, I wouldn't message him, I'd pick up my phone and call the help line number that I have saved. Like i've done in the past. And I don't want to have to tell him I'm down for him to reply to my message. I'm making him sound like a total jackass right now and when in reality he's absolutely lovely and supportive, and if I really did reach out like he asks me to he'd be there for me. I just had a shower, my head is still pounding and I know when I go to sleep tonight I'm going to have another nightmare.